I 
However hard I try to disappear,
To hide away, to melt into the gloom,
In every corner of this crowded room
I turn my head to find that you are near.

My masquerade has been of no avail:
You cannot be deceived by gaudy paint
The masks of frightful hag or blushing maid
Can"t hide the face you know all too well.

And when you speak, I dare not raise my eyes...
Yet when I make to answer - you are gone.
On this e"er-changing field I"m but a pawn
In any game you care to devise.

The intricate design of doubt and pain -
An endless waltz to which we swirl in vain.


II
An endless waltz to which we swirl in vain,
A subtle war of virtue and desire,
An icy wave against the wall of fire,
A scorching sun behind the veil of rain.

We have become the masters in this game:
We"ve learned too well the rules of fair romance
So when you do invite me for a dance
I must perforce indifference proclaim.

If I"m in tears you appear glad,
If you are entertained, I"m feeling bored
Whatever you dislike holds me enthralled
I gaily laugh whenever you are sad.

And yet for all my show of cold disdain
I am spellbound and here I remain


III
I am spellbound, and here I remain -
A subject to an unexpressed emotion.
You cannot see the depth of my devotion
Behind the indifference I feign.

You cannot know that every casual glance
You throw my way does set my heart on fire.
You cannot know that my one true desire
Is to be with you for a single dance.

And while the music plays and pairs turn
Oblivious to the world left far behind,
The sounds of eerie music fill my mind,
And leave me no will to go on.

By ancient magic you"ve ensnared me here:
A prisoner of your enchanted sphere


IV
A prisoner of your enchanted sphere -
A gilded cage for an exotic bird -
A magic siren song, which can"t be heard
A spider web of unexplained fear

To fall asleep and dream a pleasant dream
And never to give thought to life so bitter
To fall in love with your enticing glitter
Where nothing is in truth what it may seem.

I used to think that all the distant stars,
That grace the evening sky with their glow
Are happy lovers" souls of long ago
Which from their lofty heights watch over us

But in your maze of artifice and lies
Their timid light in eerie darkness dies



V 
Their timid light in eerie darkness dies,
Their voices have become forever silent.
We"re in another world - a tiny island
That I have hoped would prove a paradise.

And yet there"s little joy in darkened shore,
No breath of human speech, no sound of laughter.
This quiet I"ll remember ever after,
While longing for the life I"ve led before.

I thought that I could bind myself to you
My love was blind, my passion self-deceiving.
I didn"t know your heart was unforgiving
Give me my freedom back, I beg of you!

But you are not a man I used to know,
My fairy king - a dream of ice and snow.


VI 
My fairy king - a dream of ice and snow
A creature of ambition and conceit
Of subtle stealth and elegant deceit,
An ancient relic of an era long ago.

Your eyes so wise have seen perhaps too much
You have grown tired of what life has to offer
You"re like a miser, staring at your coffer,
So full of treasure that you dare not touch.

Your dreaming city with its empty streets,
Bathed in the frozen light of diamond stars.
Its mighty gates which nothing ever bars,
Abandoned squares where no one ever meets.

I yearn to fly this place, to run, to go...
My destination is as yet unknown.


VII 
My destination is as yet unknown,
But I am set to leave this dreary place.
Afraid that I will never see your face,
Afraid I"ll have to face the world alone,

In fear of you, in fear of your pursuit,
Of your relentless ever-gaining hounds,
The hunting horns with their bloodthirsty sounds,
The maddened horsemen desperate for loot

I know I"ll be forever in your debt,
This memory will never be eroded.
Yet I will leave you to your sad abode, 
Which you will haunt long after I am dead

I hurry on, oblivious to your cries
Though many walls may on my way arise


VIII 
Though many walls may on my way arise
I look ahead and find myself undaunted
I'm unexpected and, perhaps, unwanted,
But I'll fulfill my quest and claim my prize.

I do not know the path I have to tread,
I do not know whom I might meet in travels,
I'll watch the mystic thread as it unravels
And follow it without fear or dread.

What I have left behind is darker still -
The very memories I loath and abhor.
There's no return to what we had before:
I will not come to you - do what you will.

And yet I'll ever hope for your embrace
To crown this lonely and uncertain race.



IX
To crown this lonely and uncertain race
I know I shall be broken and remade.
My memories shall lead a small parade
Before my eyes... and leave without a trace.

A painful lesson, if a necessary one,
A useful flagellation of my soul.
A death, a change, a birth, a novel role.
And nothing will remain as it's begun.

But if a puzzle piece should be forgot...
If I should stay forever incomplete,
And be a victim of a sure defeat
Before the battle of my life is fought.

The day will only witness gentle rain - 
The nights will hear the howls of darker pain.


X
The nights will hear the howls of darker pain,
But only smile will see the light of day.
Life is a stage - "tis true. The roles we play
Obscure the other truth. We cry in vain

For understanding, warmth, perhaps for love...
That dance we dance - an exquisite charade:
The desp"rate are in happiness arrayed,
The wolves are sheep, a raven plays a dove.

We speak of warmth, but know only cold,
We long of peace, but do not know it"s meaning.
We praise the coming end as a beginning...
But it is done... Our story has been told.

And we will weep for nothing will remain
The wheel will turn, the world will change again.


XI
The wheel will turn, the world will change again,
The rainbow colors fade to black and white,
The night will usher in the morning bright.
And with the daylight I"ll recall the pain.

All fairy tales are fated to conclude,
An exiled prince is given back his right,
A villain is defeated by a knight...
But it is just a prologue, a prelude.

A ball is at an end, the guests have left,
But still the music lingers unforgiving.
I am afraid to go, afraid of leaving
My soul behind and feeling lost, bereft...

The magic of your night shall be erased.
And I will stay bewildered and amazed.


XII
And I will stay bewildered and amazed,
Lost in you world of make-belief affection.
Unsure of myself, of your reaction...
My way shall melt into the morning haze.

Abrupt, unwelcome, unexpected morning.
We"re creatures of the magic of the night.
A fairy maiden and a perfect knight,
One e"er aloof, the other ever yearning.

A rude awakenening, an end to pleasant dream,
The happy end"s not for the likes of us.
One paragon another often mars:
Thus I shall leave and you shall reign supreme.

But ere we confess to all our faults
Please grant my wish again for one last waltz



XIII
Please grant my wish again for one last waltz
Let"s twirl and turn like there is no tomorrow.
The night is ours, the time is ours to borrow,
Before the sky is rent by Eos" bolts,

Before the light comes to dispel the dark,
Before the gaudy sunlight blinds the moon,
Just dance with me - I need no other boon -
And let the nightingale command, and not the lark.

Just dance with me and look into my eyes,
And let me find my happiness in yours.
I know, how fleeting is its course
And how persuasive are its lies.

Forget the morning with its sad assaults.
Let"s dance, oblivious to each other"s faults


XIV
Let"s dance, oblivious to each other"s faults.
Live in the moment - in a single pace,
Too unconcerned to look upon the face
Of Fate, to know the contents of its vaults.

I know that every ball must have an end,
A nightmare hides behind every dream,
A laughter"s culminated in a scream,
But what is broken once will often mend.

And so I"ll take my leave of you, my lord,
And wait again for an uncertain meeting,
A secret tryst, dark, fearfull and fleeting,
A note of hope, a desperate accord.

A memory long-forgotten brings me here,
However hard I try to disappear.

XV
However hard I try to disappear,
An endless waltz to which we swirl in vain.
I am spellbound and here I remain -
A prisoner of your enchanted sphere.

Their timid light in eerie darkness dies,
My fairy king - a dream of ice and snow.
My destination is as yet unknown,
Though many walls may on my way arise.

To crown this lonely and uncertain race
The nights will hear the howls of darker pain.
The wheel will turn, the world will change again.
And I will stay bewildered and amazed

Please grant my wish again for one last waltz
Let"s dance, oblivious to each other"s faults.